You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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