I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
