Me. At least after what I've been through.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
