Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
