i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
