i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
