Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
