If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize