I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
