What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
