butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I love you.
Bad choice
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