nut hugger
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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