hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
