So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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