from now on my penis is your penis
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
