so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You can't just leave with hair like that
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Randomize
