textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
