Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
