We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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