You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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