you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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