i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
