I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
