I feel great
I just peed on a car
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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