I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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