You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
