yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Randomize