Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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