9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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