angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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