Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize