Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
