So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
