hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
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