hell yes lets make some ravioli
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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