Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
