I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize