sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize
