You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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