it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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