You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
