she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
PS: I just woke up from my shower
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Randomize
