Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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