I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
