While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
