it wasn't lemon gatorade
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize