ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
