Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(408): View more from California

hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner

(1-408): View more from California

if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends

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(718): View more from New York

we need to drink 2009 down the drain

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

thanks for singing to me while i puked last night

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.

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(512): View more from Texas

we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?

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(601): View more from Mississippi

I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"

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(419): View more from Ohio

He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.

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