she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
