You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
