Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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