@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize